Parenting-N-Families

Many parents feel that they are distancing their children from themselves when they set strict rules. But this is not at all true. Although children complain, sulk and get upset whenever you place a firm foot down, they understand inside that this only means that you care. When you set and enforce parameters on your children, they begin to see how you care for them, love them, and are concerned for their safety.
It is always a little difficult to introduce and develop new rules. Many parents avoid setting rules as they do not want any unpleasantness or confrontation. But the unpleasant things do not necessarily speak of your relationship with your children. It is in an adolescent’s nature to break rules and push limits while growing up. Very often, we want to be a friend to our child, but this is not allowed for while laying down rules. Your primary duty as a parent is to nurture, protect and provide for your children.
Often one finds that parents react with disproportionate harshness and rigorous punishment whenever their child breaks a rule. This only undermines how effective the rule is. Instead of doing this, you should discuss the repercussions of breaking a rule while introducing it itself. Let your child know before hand what will happen if a rule is broken. You must make yourself very clear about limits and consequences so that the child has a clear picture of what happens when a rule is broken. Ensure that the punishments that ensue are reasonable and connected with the violation. Suppose you catch your son smoking with his friends, you could ground him and restrict all social activities for at least two weeks.
Make sure that all punishments involve only the penalty that you and your child have discussed prior to the rule breaking. In addition to this, ensure that you do not issue empty threats. It is only natural for you to be angry when one of your rules has been broken, and you might not be able to control a reaction. We often end up saying things we do not really mean in anger. The best thing to do would be to take some time off to cool down before saying anything.
Do not leave any room for doubt in your child. Be consistent and try your best to follow through with all disciplinary actions that you have decided on in the event of a violation.